The time has finally come. The last of the chapters are now in the editor’s hands and I am facing the precipice of publishing. I have a cover; I need a back blurb, but I am terrified. Don’t get me wrong, I love to write and this is my first complete manuscript. I have paid for professional editing, poor John, had to endure my early attempts. It takes some effort to not only write a book but do it as well as you possibly can. With practice, I believe I have improved. John says I have but he is too kind to say anything less.
What shall I do? Throw my first-born on the slush pile of Amazon? Try for an agent, at my age? Put it aside and know I did my best, feels like another alternative. But the worst of it is that I must make a decision and doing nothing is also a decision. I may stall and look for Beta readers first. They tell me it is a necessary part of polishing a book.
I have been working on an author’s platform. It is a soul-sucking enterprise. I will tweet now and again. I am just starting on Instagram and I find it hard to comprehend. My Facebook page has stalled at 1586 likes and my LinkedIn profile has expanded but there is another platform I’m having some doubts about. Social Media is the way of the world but I feel lost in the Forbidden Forest.
What would you do?
My Kindle is full, holy crap, I did not know that could happen. How the heck do you fill a reading device?? I’d done a review for an author I’d met at a panel discussion and was trying to figure out why it hadn’t appeared on Amazon. So I checked and found that the device was full and would no long communicate with my WiFi. Who knew??
Now, I will admit to being one of those evil people that scans through all the book marketing emails I get, BookBub, Book Shout, and so on ad nauseam for interesting books that are free. Authors are the new targets for the internet vultures. Real Estate agents were their first targets and I have hung up on so many marketers trying to sell me “top ten on Google, Yahoo, Bing” and some just plain websites hoping to squeeze their living out of you. But, I digress as always, sorry darlings. I have been ‘one-clicking’ on a lot of free books without realizing I was filling my e-reader with stuff I would never read. I will say that I have also found several good authors this way and left reviews to that effect. Now the toll of what I have done has come due. I must either read the books or “delete from device”.
I have learned something very important along the way. When I don’t have space on my device, I don’t waste time scanning through emails looking for free books. (yes, the saying you get what you pay for does come to mind, now!) I have time to blog, more time to write more time to plan out my writing and more time to…well just about everything. I have not yet removed enough from my device to allow it to connect with my WiFi yet and that surprises me. I’ve deleted over twenty books. Now to be fair, some of what I have deleted are books I have read, start to finish. These were good books, and I did pay for several of them, but, well, I have to “manage content” now so unless the work is of a research nature or historical content, I’ve read it and won’t be reading it again. I am one of those poor folks that can’t read a book twice (most books there are exceptions). I have a memory (currently, it could change) that once I’ve read a book or seen a movie I generally don’t want to experience it again. I know how it ends. I remember it, so sadly, I have deleted some books that if I had not been stupid and downloaded every mildly interesting sounding free book I came across, some of those good books would still be with me.
Well, it’s 2016 and everyone is wishing me a Happy New Year and good cheer and well, you get it. I do try to be pleasant and smile at the appropriate times. I have also tried to be upbeat about the whole thing but the problem with all that cheer and it’s a new year, new start, stuff is it just isn’t true. It’s just another day.
I see you cringing and hear the ‘oh, poor old dear’ thoughts in your head. I should I’ve had them and felt sorry for the ‘old’ folks, nothing left to look forward too, poor lambs. I will bet you even made a couple of resolutions. Haha got ya there didn’t I! Yes, I used to make resolutions too. There were times I wrote them down with numbers and even, forgive me, dates on which I shall have completed this particular improvement. All that was back when I was a disgusting size six without a wrinkle or a care.
Now in case you were possibly feeling slightly sorry for me, stop. I drank the champagne, Perrier Jouet no less. (I admit to being unable to make an um-lout over the ‘e’ but you get the idea) I have done enough damage to my liver and poor brain with cheaper drink but I have decided if I’m going to do something ‘bad’, hell, do it with the good stuff. I do actually have stuff to look forward to and resolutions of sorts. There are things I must handle this year because 2017 is a watershed year. I will explain that in a later post.
I think it is just that I have kind of partied out. I ‘ve done so many company parties, Air Force functions, military drunk-outs, and neighborhood beer fests (which are a lot more fun in Germany with really good beer) that I’ve become bored with the whole affair. You know how it goes. Fancy dress, high heels (hours on high heels should count as karma points, seriously) maybe even professionally done hair and loads of make-up so that I can stand around drinking and ‘socializing’ with the right folk. It was required at times and strongly suggested at others. I did enjoy a few of them but many were very tense or worse left me so hung over I was worshipping at the porcelain altar. Yes, good times! gag
So, I am now Scrouge wishing no further greetings of Happy New Year. I am happy because I made it to the new year and sad because there are those that did not and should have. What is that line from an old Kate Bush song about making a deal with God to change places with someone? She was way to young to realize how much we all wish we could make the deal, once in a while. I am fully into 2016 or any other year I make it through and that is happy enough for me.